50 Nifty Texas Puns & Jokes for Texas Instagram Captions

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Looking for hilarious Texas puns to share with friends before a trip to Austin, San Antonio, or Dallas? Or perhaps you want a few clever puns to use as Texas Instagram captions on your trip? Here are my favorite Texas jokes and puns to help make your amazing trip even more enjoyable!

Read Next: 101 Travel Puns & Jokes for Hilarious Travel Instagram Captions

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Jokes about Texas Puns for Texas Instagram Captions

How to Use these Texas Puns & Jokes

Feel free to use this post to find puns and jokes about Texas for your photo captions, Instagram captions, Texas Whatsapp status, Viber status, or however you want!. If you do use one, I’d love if you linked or tagged me so I can enjoy your work! 

If you use one on a website, please link to this post. Otherwise, you can follow and tag me on social media so I can see you using them in action:

Instagram: @historyfangirl

Facebook: Stephanie Craig – History Fangirl

Twitter: @ahistoryfangirl

Essential Travel Resources for 2021 & 2022

These are my favorite companies that I use on my travels.

Find the best deals on hotels & vacation rentals on Booking.com.

For road trips and ground transportation, rent a car through Discover Cars.

Find the best city tours, day tours, bus tours, & skip-the-line tickets on GetYourGuide.

For packing and travel essentials order via Amazon.

For travel guidebooks to have with you during your trip, I always pick one or two (or five) from Rick Steves, Lonely Planet, Moon Travel Guides, or Fodor’s Travel Guides.

See also
The 7 Most Beautiful West Coast Lighthouses & How to Visit Them!

Get reliable travel insurance through World Nomads.

Book an affordable family or romantic photography session on your trip through Flytographer (Use the code HISTORYFANGIRL for 25% off your first photoshoot).

The Best Texas Puns for Texas Instagram Captions

Here are my favorite Texas puns for every circumstance.

Texas City Puns


Dallas my love has come along

Ready for a San Antoni-bros weekend?

Austin cream pie

El Paso the dutchie on the left-hand side

I’m wide a-Waco


I’ll have an Amarillo sour.

Never gonna give Lubbock. Never gonna let you down.

And Bingo was his Plano.


Killeen Eve

I put a Denton those Girlscout Cookies


Oh my god! They k**led McKenney. You bastards!

A kid in Port Arthur’s court.

Weekend at Boerne’s.

Marfa Stewart

A very merry un-Forth Worth-day to me.


And I ran, Aransas far away.

Gruene with envy.

Frisco Business.

Texas Travel Puns


Big Bend and Snap

This trip has been amazing, but it’s time to Alamo home.

No man is a Padre Island

‘Cause if you like it, then you shoulda put a bluebonnet.

Mustang Island, think you better slow your mustang down


I’d like a salad with a side of Cadillac Ranch.

Feeling Longhorn-y

Come on the risin’ wind, we’re goin’ up around the Brazos Bend.

This state is Texa-llent.

All that Schlitterbahns is not gold.

I’m feeling sick, but Jacobs Well.

Texas Food & Drink Puns


Spill the sweet tea.

Queso, is it me you’re looking for?

Someone call the Dr. Pepper

She’s got a brisket to ride

She’s my Frito pie.


I’ve got chilis. They’re multiplying.

Great Tex-Mex-tations.

I don’t know why you say goodbye, I say queso

This is Texas Stew-pendous.

Yes we pecan.

Texas Beer Puns


Life without you is un-beer-able.

Don’t worry, be hoppy.

Another great Texas vacation. I’ve got Deja brew.

Funny, but it’s still Shiner Bock and roll to me

See also
The Best National Parks in Utah

Lone Star Beers for Fears

The Netherlands - Amsterdam - Amsterda Souvenir Beer Bottle

Ale yeah.

We made some pour decisions last night.

Grin and beer it.

Don’t mind if I brew.

Gotta look pitcher perfect for Instagram, right?

Want more Hilarious Travel Puns?

I’m a little obsessed with travel puns. If you are too, check out:

For more great travel quotes, check out my entire library of Travel Quotes, Puns, & Memes.

Don’t Forget About Travel Insurance!

Before you leave for Texas make sure you have a valid Travel Insurance Policy because accidents happen on the road. I pay for World Nomads, and I happily recommend them. It’s especially important to get travel insurance if you’ll be hanging out in cities like Dallas or San Antonio where tourists can easily become the targets of pickpockets.

I have been a paying customer of World Nomads for travel insurance for three years, and I happily recommend them.  If you get sick, injured, or have your stuff stolen, you’ll be happy to have the ability to pay for your medical bills or replace what’s stolen or broken.

Pin these Texas Puns & Jokes About Texas for Your Trip!

Jokes about Texas Puns for Texas Instagram Captions

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